Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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