Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
