so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Panties = found
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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