"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
