Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..