the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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