I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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