she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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