at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
