Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
