and you said cock pushups were impossible
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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