If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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