He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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