They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
