girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Houston, we have a blender
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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