I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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