Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.

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(410): View more from Maryland

i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

do herpes really smell.

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These 25 Rude People Ruined Movies for Everyone Else
Read it at the TFLN blog
(732): View more from New Jersey

doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.

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(404): View more from Georgia

It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers

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(512): View more from Texas

When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man

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(347): View more from New York

THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.

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(904): View more from Florida

Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.

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