sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
