glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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