he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
