i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
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