Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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