it's too hot outside to masturbate.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
