Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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