summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
