She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
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I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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