last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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