So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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