So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
