Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
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