all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
