Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Randomize
