Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
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