I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize