i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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