So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I just got carded by a ten year old.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
