I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Wipe that smile off your face.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
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my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
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Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.