Define "chronic" masturbator.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
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