I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
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