This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
