you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
