her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
