Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Plan B is the new Plan A
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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