Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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