I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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