Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
