This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
