i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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