ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
