she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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