Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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